Ram Gopal Varmalargely known for cult movies like SatyaRangeela, Company, Sarkar and more, has surely been missing in action in the last few years. Even some of the movies which he has made were duds and failed to hold the charm of his earlier movies. As ‘Satya’ re-released in theatres after 27 years, the ‘Nishabd’ maker has finally realised and confessed what went wrong with him. He not only realised his on mistake, but he penned an inspiring note for many other film-makers as well who seem to get lost on their path.
The director titled this note as a ‘A SATYA CONFESSION TO MYSELF’. He wrote, “By the time SATYA was rolling to an end , while watching it 2 days back for 1st time after 27 yrs, I started choking with tears rolling down my cheeks and I dint care if anyone would see. The tears were not just for the film, but were more for what happened since. Making a film is like giving birth to a child originating from throes of passion without truly realising what kind of a child I am giving birth to. That’s because a film is made in in bits and pieces without one really knowing what’s being made and when it is ready the concentration is on what others are saying about it and after that ,whether it’s a hit or not, I move on too obsessed with what’s next to reflect and understand the beauty of what i myself created.”
He further added, “Till 2 days back I ignored the countless inspirations it sparked by dismissing it as just another step in my journey towards an objective less destination. Coming back to the hotel after the screening of SATYA, and sitting in the dark i I din’t understand why with all my so called intelligence, I did not set this film as a benchmark for whatever I should do in the future. I also realised I didn’t just cry for the tragedy in that film but I also cried in joy for that version of myself .. And I cried in guilt for my betrayals of all those who trusted me due to SATYA”
He confessed that he was drunk on success and arrogance but only realised that when he re-watched Satya two days ago during the film’s screening. He said, “I became drunk not on alcohol but on my own success and my arrogance though I didn’t know this till 2 days back When the bright lights of a RANGEELA or a SATYA blinded me, i lost my vision and that explains my meandering into making films for shock value or for gimmick effect or to make a vulgar display of my technical wizardry or various other things equally meaningless and in that careless process, forgetting such a simple truth that technique utmost can elevate a given content but it can’t carry it.”
He wrote more, “Some of my later films might have been successful but I do not believe that any of them had the same honesty and integrity which is in SATYA. My very unique vision that drove me to create something path breaking in cinema also blinded me to the value of what i myself made and I became a man hurriedly running so fast looking up towards the horizon. that I forgot to look down at the garden I’d planted beneath my feet, and that explains my various falls from grace.”
RGV has now promised himself to watch Satya before he makes any new film. “I obviously can’t make any amends now for what I already did , but i promised myself 2 nights back while wiping away my tears , that every film I make from now onwards will be made with a reverence towards why I wanted to become a director in the 1st place. I might not be able to make a film like SATYA ever again , but not even having an intention to do so is an unpardonable crime against Cinema. I don’t mean that I should keep making films like SATYA but irrespective of the genre or the subject matter the least it should have is the sincerity of SATYA.”
He further recalled what Francis Coppola was asked by an interviewer after he made ‘Godfather’. “I could see him squirming because i could see that it din’t occur to him,” he said adding, “No one asked me about any film I was about to make post SATYA whether it will be as good, but what’s worse is that I din’t ask myself. I so wish I could go back in time and made this one cardinal rule for myself , that before deciding on any film to make , I should watch SATYA once again… If I followed that rule I am sure I would not have made 90% of the films I made since then.”
Varma further urged film-makers to not get carried away in their success. He concluded, “I truly mean this as a wake up call to every film maker , who just gets carried away in self indulgence due to his own state of mind at any given moment without measuring it against the standards set by either themselves or others. Finally now i took a vow that whatever little of my life is left , I want to spend it sincerely and create something as worthy as SATYA and this truth I swear on SATYA.”
