In the golden era of parallel cinema, Smita Pati stood tall—not just for her nuanced performances, but for the unapologetic choices she made in life. Among them was her deeply emotional and controversial relationship with actor Raj huge. It was a love that bloomed amid chaos, endured public backlash, and eventually left behind an aching legacy.
When Sparks Flew Amidst Storms
Their first meeting was on the sets of ‘Bheegi Palkein’. Raj Babbar, already married to theatre actor Nadira Babbar, was taken in by Smita’s remarkable intensity and free-spirited nature. Despite their initial differences, something inexplicable drew them together. Smita, known for her humility despite being a critically acclaimed actress, often sought Raj’s advice. The professional camaraderie gradually turned into a deep emotional bond.
In an interview with Hindustan Times, Raj once said, “My relationship with Smita was not the result of problems with Nadira—it just happened.” On December 10, 1981, Raj Babbar and Smita Patil were married in a quiet ceremony. At the time, Raj was still legally married to Nadira, making Smita his second wife under Hindu personal law.With their marriage, a turbulent chapter began—one marked by emotional upheaval, judgment, and loneliness.
Smita’s Unconventional Path
For a woman who had worked closely with feminist movements, Smita’s decision to marry a married man shocked many. The backlash was intense—not just from the media and film fraternity, but also from the very circles she once championed. Yet, Smita remained steadfast, guided by what she believed to be love in its rawest form.Born to social reformer Vidyatai Patil and politician Shivajirao Girdhar Patil, Smita was raised with strong values. She was discovered by Shyam benegal while working as a newsreader on Doordarshan and went on to redefine Indian cinema through films like ‘Bhumika’, ‘Arth’, ‘Mandi’, and ‘Jait Re Jait’. Whether in offbeat or mainstream cinema, she brought truth to every character she played.
A Love Wrapped in Pain
Their relationship, though deeply emotional, was far from easy. In a rare and revealing interview, the late actress once confessed, “In the kind of situation we are involved in, both of us are going through a private hell. It’s very easy to say ‘it’s okay’. But it’s not very easy in reality.”She acknowledged the pain Nadira must have felt, but also clung to her own reality—the fierce desire to love and to be loved. In a heartbreakingly human moment, Smita described her life with Raj as a “painful trip,” marred by insecurity and loneliness.
Motherhood and Tragedy
Despite everything, Smita longed for motherhood. That wish came true when she gave birth to their son, Prateik, in November 1986. But joy was short-lived. Just a few days after childbirth, complications set in. Smita Patil, the woman who had portrayed strength and struggle on screen so effortlessly, succumbed to post-partum complications on December 13, 1986, leaving her newborn behind. She was only 31.Smita’s death was not just the loss of an artist—it was a gut-wrenching blow to those who loved her. Raj Babbar, broken by grief, returned to Nadira, while Prateik was raised by Smita’s parents.
A Wife’s Silent Strength
Nadira Babbar’s response to it all was perhaps one of the most poignant aspects of this story. Despite being hurt and publicly judged, she never wavered in her composure. She accepted Raj back not out of weakness, but out of a quiet strength and a desire to protect her children from emotional damage.She even attended Smita’s funeral with her children, Juhi and Arya. Years later, she would recall the pain of that day, and the sorrow she felt not just for her own loss, but for Smita’s unfulfilled dreams. “The grief of her passing away became larger than any other sorrow. It broke us all—Raj, Prateik, her parents and somewhere, me too,” she admitted as reported on Bollywoodshaadis.
A Love Remembered
Raj Babbar, when asked about Smita, still speaks with emotion. He never denies the storm they lived through. But he also never downplays what she meant to him. “Every little thing she said or did, and how she looked at me when she first met me… her whole life comes alive in front of my eyes,” he once said to Reddif.com.“Thoughout the journey from home to hospital, she kept apologising and I told her that everything would be okay. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. Her look said it all. The doctor came out after an hour and said she had gone into a coma. I was part of her and she was part of me. It is natural that you miss a person who was your heart and soul throughout your life, no matter how brave you may say you are. She and her memories will continue to be part of me till my last day,” he added.Smita Patil’s story is not one of flawless love or picture-perfect endings. It is the story of a woman who dared to love despite knowing the consequences, who embraced contradictions, and who lived—and died—on her own terms. Her legacy lives on, not just in the films she left behind, but in the echoes of a love that never fit into society’s neat little boxes.
